Food and my ramblings

This weekend will mark the end of our second week here in the little town of Campbell. I admit that I've had my bouts of home-sickness in the last few days. However, it hasn't stopped me from exploring both inside and outside of our home.

I craved donuts last weekend which lead to the discovery of Psycho Donuts. These are definitely not your average donuts. Pictured above, "Feng Shui" (left) and "Strawberry Fields" (right). While the donuts are definitely on the sweet side, the artful and crazy-themed shop is enough to keep me coming back for more! I highly suggest checking out their website here.

With both Marc and I still unemployed, we have to make use of our resources. I'm also pretty lazy when it comes to going to the grocery store. I made some banana bread with our close-to-rotting (not yet rotten) bananas. Not so bad!

I've been trying to make Pad See Ew the way they make it at some of my favorite Thai restaurants. Truthfully, I've had one too many fails and finally this week, the food gods were good to me as I was finally able to put the right sauces together. Score!

In addition to food, I have been trying to keep myself busy by engaging in a supposedly fruitful activity known as job-hunting. To say the least, it hasn't been quite as progressive as I intended for it to be. I keep trying to trick myself by saying that it's time to go back to work. As of today, I have been unemployed for 1 month. I have not been without a job since I was 15 so I'm sadly experiencing symptoms of withdrawal. I'm hoping next week will be a better week and I'm praying that waves of motivation sweep me off my feet and allow me to get further along in this search.

I have also been having my daily dose of library time. My goal is to visit every library in Santa Clara county. The novelty of a nifty blue library card was my gift to myself this week. So far, I find the Saratoga Library to be the best. It not only has the best atmosphere but it has friendly people and a wide selection of both books and media. I currently have about 10 books checked out (mostly cookbooks) and way too many CD's.

To library patrons of Santa Clara county, I apologize for checking out every single Broadway musical CD. I am trying to build my collection in the most cost-effective way so I'll be burning these babies for a few days before checking them back in. You're welcome to come over if you need something stat. To the libraries I have yet to hit, I'll be emptying you out soon. Sunnyvale, you're next! P.S.: I'm on the hunt for the OBC Recordings of Gypsy and Tick, Tick, Boom!

Ok, I really need to find a job. Preferably, a non-desk job.

Happy Good Friday to you all and have a spectacular Easter!

When it rains, it snows!

Snow on my butt-evidence of falling hard-many times.

The heavy rains brought blankets of snow to Southern California's mountains in the past few weeks. We're talking about fresh, powdery snow. Translation: Ideal conditions for snowboarding. Nearly four years ago, I invested in a snowboard, several pieces of gear and a season pass to a local resort. I made the pilgrimage to the mountain almost every other weekend. Marc, our sisters and myself were really faithful about waking up at the crack of dawn and heading out by 6am on Sunday mornings. I never got really good at it. I'm sad to say that I haven't made it back since then. School and other things took over and the snow disappeared sooner and sooner each year. I've thought of selling my board several times. Lift tickets have risen in price, it's such a hassle to drive up the mountain especially when chains are required and well....I just totally suck. This snowboard is now patiently parked in the garage of my parents' home. Whenever I look at, I think about the many hobbies and projects I've started yet have never come to finish or fulfill. I'm instantly reminded of second, third, fourth, endless chances. I'm reminded of growing, progress, and practice. I'm reminded of how impatient I can be and how I need to learn to "just give it some time." It may have been years since my last run down the mountain but I'm certain that it won't be the last.

A dose of positivity

As this month draws to a close, I am slowly coming to terms with my life and the inevitable changes it brings along. I've learned my lesson. No matter how hard you try to take matters into your own hands and how detailed you make your plans, it will not go through unless it's what God has in store for you. Once He's already pointed the way, there's no use in trying to defy it by making up excuse after excuse and selfishly attempting to do it all on your own because you believe you can control everything. Don't get me wrong,as humans, we have the freedom to make choices but we can't take full control of our lives.Inevitable changes will come about and it's how we choose to deal with them that will make all the difference. I got a letter in the mail from a friend yesterday and she said "There is no best answer or right answer, you just have to learn to take chances." That being said, I'm going to Vegas in 2 weeks to gamble away what's left of my savings in hopes of being able to pay off all my debts. I'm going to take a chance. (Not!) Wish me luck!

Open thoughts

I am done fearing what lies ahead, with having "concrete plans" and living the illusion of being secure. I'm ready to tackle the uncertainty of life by living each moment and enjoying the process instead of focusing on a deceptive destination that may not even exist. I'm not looking for a specific or ideal place or situation to be in, I just want to experience life, grow from the experiences and help others along the way. I want to discover. I want to create. I want to share.

Life is too short to waste.

The Unplanned Career

I've casually mentioned my frustration with my current job throughout this blog. A few months ago, I picked up this book by my favorite publisher , Chronicle Books. I started reading it without any expectation of finding solutions to my current career woes and concerns. I recently finished reading and working through it. Though I may not have a concrete plan of how I should go about seeking my next career, (whatever that may be) I've gained enough hope and inspiration from this book to keep learning about myself and trying new things.

It is so common in today's society to identify people by what they do for a living rather than who they are as a person. There are many people out there who are known simply for their significant accomplishments in their respective careers. These people are so stuck to their titles that it becomes who they are. I've even heard that some people tend to 'lose themselves' in their careers. Good for them. However, I still wish that society wouldn't undervalue character traits so much like they do now. Just because I'm not a lawyer or a doctor does not mean that I'm not a good person. What about my punctuality? My willingness to take initiative? My care and a concern for others? Apparently such things don't seem to weigh as much as saving a company from the depths of bankruptcy or generating a few million dollars in sales.

While I'm definitely an ambitious and driven person, I don't view myself as a 'career woman.' I don't want to be identified by what I do for a living. At the same time, I am attached to what I've accomplished so far and would hate to give up what I have already worked so hard for. It's a constant battle of self vs. self. You may wonder how that's even possible or perhaps you know exactly what I'm speaking of. In either case, we all have to make decisions and choices in our lives. More often than not, we struggle over them. If we didn't, making choices wouldn't be such a big deal, right? I'm all about learning from experiences and taking opportunities. If we bypassed every opportunity presented to us, how would we know what it's like to experience something new? We may not always be pleased with the outcome but at least we could say we tried, right?

Growing up in a community surrounded by medical professionals, I couldn't help but push myself down that career path only to find out that it wasn't for me. I still remember my high-school graduation party when I told guests I would be majoring in nursing. It was a safe answer. In fact, it was the only word that every SDA Filipino adult would want to hear. Well, besides 'doctor,' of course. I ended up changing my major two quarters into my college career. I couldn't handle the sciences. Four years of college and a master's degree later, I am still learning about myself and finding out that degrees earned may not necessarily lead to the 'ultimate career experience' that most talk so fondly about. Or it could be that I'm just not into careers.

I was given the false impression that once you're out of school, you will work and make money. With that money, you will buy everything you want and need and you will be happy. FALSE. Not everything will be handed to you in a silver platter. There will always be unknowns and you will have to keep putting yourself out there. It's because of the fear of the so-called 'unknown' that I found myself hiding in the caves of academia, trying hard to savor every moment of the 'safe world.' Writing numerous papers, working out statistics problems and taking exams isn't exactly the fairy-tale description of a 'safe world' or is it? To me, it was better than scrounging around my bank account to pay bills and sitting at a desk for 8 hours a day. Putting yourself out there is more difficult than it sounds but I'm warming up to the fact that it could lead to great things. I'm living and growing from my experiences day by day.

I yearn for the feeling of fulfillment more than a hefty paycheck. I want to be one of those people who love their jobs. Who knows, maybe I won't get that far but maybe I will find something (an activity or a hobby or anything) that will fill the void of the 'successful career.' In that case, maybe I will be able to look at whatever job I have at the moment as 'just a job' and be able to function normally during the hours of 8-5. Now if only there weren't things called bills, this road wouldn't be so difficult to travel on. Careers don't have to define who we are. Stay true to yourself because no matter what others may say, it's your character that defines who you really are and that in itself will take you far.

The design of self discovery

Graphic design classes require a lot of time, inspiration, and creativity. After enrolling in these classes, I knew I would struggle somewhat. I suffer from chronic Type A personality disorder. As a result, I like to get things done and over with as quickly as possible. In both undergrad and grad-school, I made it a point to have my assignments ahead of time to avoid the stressful time crunch as the due date came close. As much as I want to finish my assignment right now, my creative juices do not seem to be flowing and I've learned that it's not something you can force out of yourself. I'm supposed to be designing a DVD cover for my Digital Imaging class yet here I am blogging.

Among other things, taking these classes have taught me how to be patient, take (lots of) breaks and relax. I've come to learn that taking your time isn't such a bad thing. Furthermore, waiting 'til the last minute creates an unbelievable rush that exercises one's response to pressure. My graphic design work may not be the best but I am glad that I am learning how to step outside of my box to explore possibilities....even if they may contradict my personality or be something I would never think to do. I find that I am learning more about myself in these classes than graphic design itself. Self discovery is essential to our personal growth. I encourage everyone to step outside of their comfort zones and try something new. You'll be amazed at what you learn about yourself.

I will now leave you with the progress of my current assignment.